10.21.2023
That date has a permanent place etched in my memory, but holds a piece of my heart. I have been dreaming of this day. Notching my first tag. In all honesty, I am still processing this moment. I would never had guessed a mountain lion would be the first tag I filled. Add that to killing a mountain lion in my yard in June, I would say my chances of seeing again were slim to none. But that is not the story God had planned for me.
Getting up to go hunting was slow that morning, I was exhausted from two days at State Tournament for soccer with my older two. But I knew if I wanted my mule deer, today was the day to put in the miles and the work. So I got myself going, stopped and got gas and absorbed my brain in Brian Barney's podcast. There was a point in the podcast where they focused on making mistakes because of not slowing down. It stuck with me.
A few days prior I had talked to my friend Brooke. She reiterated that same message to me. I knew in these moments I had to slow down and process to make the correct decisions. We discussed where to go in the area I was hunting. She shared with me to have my cat tag ready, that they were in there. If I had not heard those words, I would not have even had my eye out for them.
I got there threw on my pack and headed to what felt like the steepest hike in but knew it would get me to the best glassing spot, close to where I saw my target buck a week ago. The wind would be where I wanted when I got to the top ridge. It was close to a short 1000 ft elevation gain. I will be honest, it kicked my butt going in. Those moments where my body is telling me different than what my mind is wanting to do, frustrate the heck out of me. They make me feel weak and starting my hunt like that was not where I wanted to be.
I finally reached the top, found a spot and starting glassing. I didn't like it. Nothing was on the glass and I did have a full view of the canyon behind me. I wanted to see all possibilities, so I got up and starting hiking along the top. I stopped every few feet to glass along the way. The sounds of turkey's echoed within the canyon to the west of me. The thought crossed my mind, well I can get a turkey if this is a bust today. I came to the turning point of the ridge and headed in east. Headed towards the spot my buck was and the way that would lead me to my planned destination.
As I approached the end of this ridge. I stopped dead in my tracks and couldn't make out what I was seeing. There was now way. There it stood on the other ridge, wide out in the open. A mountain lion. I quickly pulled out my camera to take a picture, thinking that it would be gone in seconds before I could even process anything. I still had my buck on my mind.
Then it sat down. And stayed. She wasn't going anywhere. My mind swirled. I told myself this is an opportunity you may never get again. It's time to line up for a shot.
I dropped my pack and pulled my rifle out. Every few seconds glassing over to make sure it had not left. Pulled out my range finder, 233 yards. Nope, she wasn't going anywhere. Enjoying her moment in the sun doing what seemed to be her own version of glassing.
I tightened my new Kryptek gloves then slowly pulled back the bolt and loaded a bullet into the chamber, unhooked my Marsupial Gear Bino harness and laid myself down flat in the dirt. I held the gun my left arm slightly shaking from nerves. I wasn't steady. I didn't like it. I was moving too much and I told myself if I take a shot there is a good chance I am missing. I sat up looked around for another spot. I saw a larger bush just east of me. I slowly walked over and tried to set up. It was worse and made my view worse.
Meanwhile I kept glassing, she saw me move that time. But she stayed there looking in my direction. I waited a little bit before I moved again. I went back to laying down and again in the original spot and still did not feel steady. I grabbed some rocks trying to find something to stabilize it. It wasn't working, I did not feel confident. Just a few feet from me I saw a small bush, only branches. It appeared to have some steady branches but the ground sloped down behind it.
I slid slowly to it, propped the end of the rifle on a branch and laid my body down on the hill. I drove my feet into the ground for more stability. The sun was still rising and was now directly in my eyes. It was making it hard to keep them focused through the scope. I grabbed my phone and perched it in the bush to block out the sun. The butt of the gun pressured up against my right shoulder and what I saw on the other end of the scope was exactly what I needed to see. Confidence. The shot felt steady, she was clear in my scope. It took me a minute to talk myself into doing this. If this was the right time or if I should wait until she was fully standing again. I told myself I had this and pulled the trigger.
The shot echoed around me, I stopped breathing. Those seconds seemed like an eternity and I saw it. The hit was good, she dropped back and her legs went up. Her body trembling from the impact so I released that bullet and loaded another. I locked in again more confident than the first and fired again. That hit finished and she was done, no more movement.
I waited for my breathing to start again. I glassed her, she was just laying there perfectly still. I was in shock but my history with high stress, high demand jobs I go into work mode and don't stop to process things emotionally. I called myself sister and told her what happened. She reminded me to not rush going over there. So I got off the phone and dropped my body to the ground. I knew I would need some nourishment for the pack out so I had a drink and snack then loaded my gear ready to head over.
I hiked down the ridge and up again towards the cat. I pulled my pistol out as I began ascending up the ridge to her. I wanted to be ready for anything. I got to the top and there she lay, not breathing and it hit me, I actually just did this.
I just filled my first hunting tag. A hunting season with the lowest low, missing my shot during archery season to this. A dream scenario. I take zero credit. The place she was, her patience, the shot. God was in complete control. I was just there for the ride.
I sat my pack down and knew it was time for some of the work to start but first. It was time to notch my very first tag. I pulled my blade from my pack and notched OCT and then 21. The feeling two little triangles gives you is quite surreal. The significance of hard work held within some finite paper. A feeling I never want to forget. A feeling I want to forever walk with as I continue to hunt.
Being out there solo hunting is truly the most challenging and rewarding at the same time. You have to talk yourself through each movement and decision. I laid the tag on her and I was speechless. I have such a profound respect for these animals.
Once the tag was notched it was time for the work to start. I forgot my tripod and camera so I had to take a few pictures. I used a sagebrush to prop up my phone put it on the ten second timer and got my pictures.
I got one picture of her strapped to my pack and then it was time to pack her out down the mountain. After I got the picture I had to set her down to readjust. A lot of words of willpower had to be spoken to even stand up. Once I was up we were on the hike out. Moments I had to stop and bend over to balance the weight. I have never been more excited to see my truck. Once I got to the truck, I dropped the tailgate laid sideways on it and used my right leg to push her up and rolled us into the bed of the truck.
To be honest I was not sure how I would feel processing my first animal. But I actually loved every minute of it. I have an entirely new respect for processing my own animals, putting in care for what I was blessed with. I cannot wait to have this beautiful cat sitting in my house and cook a few mountain lion meals.
It was so hard on me missing my shot this year, thinking that was how my 2023 season would end. This is such a reminder that it can change in an instant, so always be grateful. I love doing this, and I hope my passion and joy walk with me every mountain I climb. Filled tag or not.
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